Memories Of Home

My first memory, my birthday on a party bus

Pops wasn't there but that wasn't obvious

In Mom's arms, in God we trust

Black Mama love, everything marvelous

I didn't know what I was missin', part of a system

Pops is gone, Uncle in prison

Inside wishin' for men to teach me 'bout girls and religion

Made my own rendition of grindin' and kissin'

Weekend calls to my Dad I'd listen

Still I felt distant, distant like love

There's only so far that words could really hug

Didn't wanna be a thug, older ** I banged with

I learned a lot from them cuts in the basement

The smell of blunts laced with a little bit of spice

Wise, high **, giving me advice

We go out and start fights, scuff up our Nikes

Come back to talk crap and shoot a little dice

This is a slice of life and memories

Sittin' in my mind vividly, often they visit me

Da-da-da, da-da-da, da-da-da, da-da-da (oh, oh)

I'm just tryna find a way to understand (I'm tryna understand)

Oh, oh, oh, oh

How do I rewind the tape and live in it? (oh-ooh, ooh-ooh, oh-oh, oh-oh)

Stayin' out late and playin' in Wonderland (ooh-ooh, oh-oh-oh)

Is it in God's plan?

I'm just tryna find my way to understand it

Metaphors can't explain how far I came

A young man at work, I made my own lane

Steered away from pain, relied on drive

There's a old saying, "Don't cry, survive"

As I kept building there were cranes in the sky

Certain memories my brain would deny

A tear laid in my eye, I was afraid to reply

To the hurt that was callin', it came from the sky

An older play cousin, of course I trust him

But he was touchin' where he wasn't supposed to be touchin'

What's a kid supposed to do?

When they goin' through, what I was goin' through

Don't know who to go to

You want to tell somebody

In many ways, I failed somebody

That somebody was me

Now I'm talking to little Rasheed

Incarcerated heart, man, you gotta be free

I felt it, when I told my man I would help with

Things he was dealin' with I really hadn't dealt with

Emotions meltin', I began to release it

Things you can't change, you could come to peace with

At least get it better for the children of forever

I read the Lord's letter, I forgive our debtors

They don't talk about it, maybe sharing their story

Memories of home, shared pain and glory

Da-da-da, da-da-da, da-da-da, da-da-da (oh, oh)

I'm just tryna find a way to understand (I'm tryna understand)

Oh, oh, oh, oh

How do I rewind the tape and live in it? (ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh, oh-oh, oh-oh)

Stayin' out late and playin' in Wonderland (ooh-ooh, oh-oh-oh)

Is it God's plan?

I'm just tryna find my way to understand it

Said I'm tryna understand, understand, understand, understand

Ay hey, oh oh, oh